Saturday, January 07, 2006

Missed opportunity. Sat Jan 7, 2006.

01/07/2006. This was one of those situations where I felt the opportunity slip away in real-time, and afterwards a guilty conscience re-inforced the lesson. A feeling of guilt or the withdrawal of the Spirit is a wonderful feedback tool, and failures can be as instructional as successes. Since I've blogged so many good experiences, it seems only fair to record some failures. That, and the guilty conscience usually doesn't go away until I 'fess up.

I needed to drop off a payment at the Post Office Saturday night so that it would go out at the first pickup Monday. And I needed to gas up the car for Sunday travel.

There is a gas station near the Post Office but I decided to go to the Post Office first.

Right as I pulled into the gas station, I made eye contact with an Asian-looking man using the opposite side of the pump that I was driving toward. It was an eye contact that indicated some kind of connection. It was a "bingo!" moment.

But there just wasn't enough time to "cooly" approach him before he got into his car. Had I hustled, I could have gotten his attention after he entered his car, and spoken to him through his car window, but it would have come across as intrusive and "major uncool." Yet in the moments I hesitated, I felt that familiar antsy feeling of him being an "intended contact."

After the moment was gone the guilt set in, and has come to mind every day since then. (I write this Wednesday the 11th.)

If I had gone to the gas station first, the moment would have been perfect. Perhaps I failed to listen and hearken to the Spirit in my decision of going to the Post Office first. I'm not sure of that part. But, I definitely let fear overrule at the pump.

I've had this lesson before, of being prompted to step out of my comfort zone and "look stupid" for a minute, but apparently I haven't fully learned it.

The real issue wasn't that talking to the man through his car window would have been "major uncool." The issues were whether or not the Lord really wanted that man to have an opportunity to receive the Book of Mormon, and if so, whether or not I was going to obey Him by being the delivery boy.

Over the last few months, I've noticed the opportunities for book placements taper offer; or, I just haven't noticed the opportunities. I haven't been as close to the Spirit the past few months, so I assume the latter. I need to fix that.



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